Demisexuality and Mental Health, the therapist.

3. [cut for length] Is there another intersectional issue that is more important for you to find a therapist […], that you would prioritize that instead of understanding of asexuality? Have you even decided not to bother coming out to your therapist about being ace?

I think it’s good to know that your mental health and physical health impacts your sex drive. Your sexual drive may vary throughout your life. A really busy time at work may shut it down. Graduating from college may fire it up, because you cast off a big burden.

My sexual drive didn’t come online until over a year had passed after I’d seen my last therapist.

What I do think is a shame is that, though we talked around my having a partner, is that after I declared myself single, we rarely touched the issue again. As if being single was sort of a catch-all for “oh, don’t have to talk about sex, then.”

I think the taboo of NOT having sex comes into play there. It’s weird how abstinence is more shameful than sexual activity, in our culture. It’d be so much better if both were accepted.