Best coming-out conversation

I’m kinda in-the-closet about being demisexual, since it’s mostly a personal exploration so far. Still, I’ve had a few conversations about it, around Pride and with some people close to me… Yesterday I had the best. By far.

We’d been talking for a while, an allosexual and I, both of us Christians, and the other suddenly says “I want to share something” which is pretty much the equivalent of “can I talk to you off the record?” and code for entering the no-judgment zone.

After they share some doubts about their sexuality and stuff, we pause for a moment, and then I ask permission to ask a few open questions about what libido and attraction they think they have and feel… and then in explaining that basically do a big info-dump: “this is my sexuality and that’s what this means, and I’ve been sort of figuring out how all this different stuff works for me…”

It leads to an open conversation about what we’ve both been feeling and how we’re now and finally it comes to a natural end.

We share a moment of silent understanding, how sexuality can twist us into big knots in our minds sometimes, relief that we shared our private thoughts and found understanding in each other. We say goodnight.

I put my head on my desk and take a few very deep breaths because, dear God, for the first time I fully came out to a person who’s not a stranger deliberately. 

I hope I have more conversations like this.


Posted on August 23, 2015, in Personal reflection and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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