I Want to Have Sex Like… a prologue

One of the biggest questions I had about demisexuality: how do you achieve sexual satisfaction? Do you wait until you’re deeply in love?

Labeling myself demisexual didn’t mean I didn’t want to have sex, or that there was a stop to some sort of pretense. Nor did it mean I went in search of a partner. It did change how I approached masturbation and sexual fantasy. It was a big boost in my level of sexual satisfaction, in fact, because I changed my search parameters. So I will be sharing some stuff that works for me.


Posted on May 22, 2015, in Demisexual satisfaction and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. This is something I’ve also been trying to write about – the ways that sexual fantasies are a totally different thing from feeling attraction for particular people, and that sometimes someone I’m not attracted to can do a thing that I find attractive (i.e. tap into a dynamic or fantasy I find appealing), but that *still* doesn’t mean I’m into that *person*. It’s complicated! I look forward to hearing more about this stuff works for you!


    • Thanks Kasey! I look forward to hearing your contributions too. I kinda got distracted by the Carnival of Aces this month, but I’ve got a post in the works. This is a series I want to illustrate with media to make it more relatable, so that takes some prep.

      Yeah… there’s a really big difference. Consider how many things you can relate to when reading a good story… yet most of that, you wouldn’t necessarily act on in real life, with your suspension of disbelief set to “off” and your inhibitions and morality fully engaged. It’s kinda the same for fantasy vs. reality in sex, I think.


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