Sexual Education, a plea

Having had sexual education in a liberal country, I got a basic introduction to the variations in couple configuration. Most guys like girls, but some like guys. Most girls like guys, but some like girls. And some guys and girls like both. Go forth, explore and be merry. Though do it with condoms, because STIs are evil. And then I got get a long, graphic presentation about exactly how evil STIs are, and me and my traumatised classmates compare mental scars during the break. And that was about it.

If you were lucky, and you had a good teacher giving you sexual education, they’ve spent some time on the fact that you need to communicate before having sex. If they were really good they will have roleplayed this communication and you spent a good part of sex ed giggling, but understanding the principle. I hope you had that. If you’re a teacher, PLEASE include it in your class.

And I had clever parents, I learned to talk about sex from them. I’m actually able to talk about sex with them and with my brother. It’s invaluable, talking about sex with people you’re in a platonic relationship with, that you trust, especially from another gender and age group. If you want to have a good sex talk, Laci Green gives her top ten tips in this sex+ episode.

If you weren’t lucky, this is the best advise I can give you: talk about sex and sexuality. Start online, if that takes the pressure off. Talk about not having sex. Talk about the wanting as well as the having. Talk about the body parts, the mechanics, the emotions. The prejudice and the social consequences. Talk about good places to get sex toys and lubrication. It has helped me a lot over the past year.

No, I haven’t had sex. Yes, I am now comfortable with the wanting, and ready to explore the having. All because of being about to talk about it.

And yes, this blog is absolutely a place where you’re free to ask questions and talk about sex. That’s what it’s for, you can read what I’ve been discovering, and perhaps you can share some of your thoughts as well.

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Posted on May 20, 2015, in What others say and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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